1 And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying,Ooh, a widdle baby chapter! At eight verses, it's the shortest yet.
2 Speak unto the children of Israel, saying, If a woman have conceived seed, and born a man child: then she shall be unclean seven days; according to the days of the separation for her infirmity shall she be unclean.
3 And in the eighth day the flesh of his foreskin shall be circumcised.
4 And she shall then continue in the blood of her purifying three and thirty days; she shall touch no hallowed thing, nor come into the sanctuary, until the days of her purifying be fulfilled.
5 But if she bear a maid child, then she shall be unclean two weeks, as in her separation: and she shall continue in the blood of her purifying threescore and six days.
6 And when the days of her purifying are fulfilled, for a son, or for a daughter, she shall bring a lamb of the first year for a burnt offering, and a young pigeon, or a turtledove, for a sin offering, unto the door of the tabernacle of the congregation, unto the priest:
7 Who shall offer it before the LORD, and make an atonement for her; and she shall be cleansed from the issue of her blood. This is the law for her that hath born a male or a female.
8 And if she be not able to bring a lamb, then she shall bring two turtles, or two young pigeons; the one for the burnt offering, and the other for a sin offering: and the priest shall make an atonement for her, and she shall be clean.
And babies are what it's all about.
- #1: The Lord says to Moses...
- #2: Tell the Israelites that women are dirty for a week after they give birth to a son. It's the same number of dirty days she'd have had with "the curse," aka "her infirmity."
- #3: Eight days after birth, circumcise the lad.
- #4: Mom will stay bloody (but in a purifying way) for thirty-three days, during which time she won't touch anything holy or go to the sancturary (this is another rule I'm wondering whether people still practice today, and if not, why not?)
- #5: Girls are dirtier — two weeks of being unclean, and sixty-six days of wallowing in purifying blood.
- #6: When she's done her stint of stewing in her purifying blood, she's to bring a lamb and a pigeon or turtledove to the tabernacle to be sacrificed (Today, where are these simple joys of motherhood?)
- #7: The priest on duty will get her all atoned up, and she'll be cleansed from that bloodiness (figuratively or literally?). This is the law for moms who give birth to sons or daughters (as opposed to hermaphrodites?).
- #8: If she can't pony up a lamb, she's to bring two turtles or young pigeons. That'll git 'er done.